dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
Randomize
