I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
