I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
