This girl is more easily done than said...
apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
