the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Randomize
