he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
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That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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