last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
