Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
