It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
