Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
