What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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