Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
