"it" just moved
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid