FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
