i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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