I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Drake has all the answers
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
