I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.