Please don't use social media to get back at me.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Randomize