party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
