girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Randomize
