How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city