I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
send nudes
from the living room?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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