i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I understand Curling. That high.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
