if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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