I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I love you.
Bad choice
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
