I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I look better un-naked...
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Randomize
