Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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