She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Randomize