my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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