i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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