rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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