I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
