I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
operation have a gay friend backfired
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Randomize
