how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
