Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Randomize