i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
