Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
