Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
You dont lie about slip and slides
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize