So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
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