At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
