Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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