Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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