Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
