Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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