But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.