Texts From Last Night

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  (682): View more from Texas

  It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good

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  (682): It's what's on the inside that counts<div>(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good</div> http://tfl.nu/bhrm
  Replies (2) Good night (906) Bad night (1054)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you definitely held a convo with a hobo

  (1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

  we have a secret handshake

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  (610): you definitely held a convo with a hobo (1-610): we have a secret handshake http://tfl.nu/i4o5
  Replies (25) Good night (4409) Bad night (606)
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  (530): View more from California

  before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake

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  (530): before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake http://tfl.nu/dlo4
  Replies (15) Good night (2206) Bad night (5066)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club

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  (815): so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club http://tfl.nu/2gpd
  Replies (9) Good night (2480) Bad night (896)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.

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  (218): I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble. http://tfl.nu/uwsi
  Replies (6) Good night (3350) Bad night (1001)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.

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  (702): I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared. http://tfl.nu/11u7
  Replies (4) Good night (3077) Bad night (1503)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.

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  (850): His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend. http://tfl.nu/ofwy
  Replies (10) Good night (1850) Bad night (649)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD

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  (815): i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD http://tfl.nu/w0y8
  Replies (3) Good night (744) Bad night (523)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?

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  (217): I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet? http://tfl.nu/vpwn
  Replies (9) Good night (1515) Bad night (566)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Who wants vodka and apple sauce

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  (608): Who wants vodka and apple sauce http://tfl.nu/g86m
  Replies (4) Good night (934) Bad night (493)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection

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  (314): A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection http://tfl.nu/gf0u
  Replies (1) Good night (801) Bad night (435)
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.

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  (906): Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night. http://tfl.nu/afvo
  Replies (4) Good night (542) Bad night (318)
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  (289): View more from Ontario

  In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.

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  (289): In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking. http://tfl.nu/ntm3
  Replies (13) Good night (455) Bad night (878)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."

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  (914): Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover." http://tfl.nu/wk3b
  Replies (4) Good night (817) Bad night (562)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.

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  (541): Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears. http://tfl.nu/9wf5
  Replies (1) Good night (776) Bad night (290)

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