We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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