just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
