i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize