Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize