just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize