dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
please come you make the beer taste better
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
